Q: What terrifies you?

Q: What terrifies you?
A: Teaching aerobics

I was recently deep in an amazing kind of professional conversation - the kind that gives you the strength and energy to continue doing difficult work - with a favorite and inspiring friend and colleague. 

We were talking about a school goal that, despite careful planning and support, has not yet been embraced by the entire school.

I tried a few different questions to better understand the situation:

• What is keeping your colleagues from moving forward with this goal?
• What do those who have moved forward with the goal have in common?
• What might those who aren't moving forward not be telling you?

We arrived at fear as a thing that could be preventing people from moving forward - not just general fear of change, but fear related to this specific goal.

I started to think about something that is totally terrifying to me:

teaching aerobics 

If I was part of a school whose data demonstrated that teaching aerobics for five minutes at the beginning of class on a daily basis would increase student achievement, I'm not sure there is anything that could be done to get me to participate in implementing that goal.

It wouldn't matter how much I read about teaching aerobics or if I practiced in a small group or if I watched videos or if a coach came in and modeled for me or if I was offered a financial incentive to teach aerobics. This idea is something that makes me feel so insecure that I'm not sure I would ever be able to actually do it. Maybe I would put on a YouTube video of someone else teaching aerobics while I sat in the back of the room and graded papers. 

And, I don't think I would ever admit that my resistance had to do with fear. I would make a million excuses. I would have a bad attitude during meetings. I might lie. I might even say terrible things about the people asking me to implement the change.

Why is this important?

Imagining myself teaching a room full of kids to do aerobics helped me better understand the incredibly legitimate reasons our colleagues have for choosing not to do something. It helped me reframe what is sometimes called resistance as something much more complicated. It helped me develop some empathy.

It helped me think about all the things our colleagues choose to never say aloud. As a coach, I might ask, "What is holding you back?" or "What obstacles are you facing?". I never before considered that people probably don't answer questions like these entirely honestly. Time, supplies, or people to collaborate with are easy answers. Fear, insecurity, or anxiety might be honest answers.

So, next time you are wondering why your colleagues won't just __________________, think of yourself doing something that really, really terrifies you. What is causing that fear? What would it take for you to move past that fear?